Credit where credit is due, I learned this from the great Tony Robbins. I just made some few changes. And because I was out for almost two weeks prior to yesterday, this will be another long post.
Imagine a chair. The more legs a chair has, the more stable it is.
Just like a chair, a belief becomes stronger when it has more legs to stand on. These legs are called references. But, to make it simpler, let’s consider those legs as your experiences.
For example, when people keep on affirming you that you are wonderful, you develop a belief that you are indeed wonderful. (That’s why I believe in affirming others.) Every affirmation becomes a leg that strengthens your belief.
On the flip side, when you keep on failing and failing, you develop a belief that whatever you do, you’ll just fail—that you’re a failure. After experiencing another failure, that belief becomes even stronger and more deeply rooted.
When you’re on the flip side, you can’t just immediately believe otherwise. Because the chair has become so stable that it cannot be easily shaken.
But, the good news is that it’s just a belief. You’re not a failure (I’m also talking to myself here, you’re not alone). And you can change this belief.
How? By slowly building another chair. When it’s finally more stable and stronger than the previous chair, you can finally make the switch and sit on the new chair. Only then can you throw away your old chair.
If you want to believe in yourself more, you have to build a new chair—the chair of self-belief. Then, you add one leg to your self-belief after another until it becomes stable enough for you to sit on.
But, building the chair of self-belief takes time. Adding legs, forming references, or creating new experiences and results takes time. And it requires action.
Instead of sulking, move forward once again and try new things. That’s the only way you can make results and create new legs. Then, you add those legs to your chair of self-belief.
For example, I shared yesterday how I really felt bad about myself for the past two weeks. I felt like a failure. And I believed that I was a failure. Because of that, I was paralyzed. But, my inaction further added legs to my belief that I was a failure.
Slowly, I picked myself up. I began believing in myself again. I began building my chair of self-belief. I acted by writing blog posts. I celebrated every blog post as a small win. Every blog post, every small win became a leg that made my chair of self-belief more stable.
Then, I tried waking up earlier and developing habits. Every time I woke up at 5:30 in the morning was a small win. And it added another leg to my self-belief.
Slowly but surely, I'm believing in myself more.
How about you? Are you struggling with your beliefs? Do you want to believe in yourself more?
Take action. Celebrate small wins. Be patient with your progress (another note to myself). Before you know it, you’ll be believing in yourself more.
Shall we get moving?